Monday 15 August 2016

Suicide Soliloquy

Charlie Nokes' last act of self harm was her final act and soliloquy in her short and painful life. Charlie was one of many amazing and talented people I met during my stay in gated retreats, and she had a never to be forgotten impact on my life. 

Charlie took her life on July 26th 2016 at HMP Peterborough. Three years earlier this IPP prisoner had worked her way to the open wing at HMP Send, and could see her way out and a future. A split from her then girlfriend, Tatiana, who was also on this wing was enough to send Charlie back to a spiral of self harm and self destructive behaviours. Over the following years she would see no way out and her self-destruct button was well and truly pressed.

The news of Charlie's passing has been met with shock amongst my community of ex-offenders, serving prisoners, reform charities and those involved in the arts. However, this shock does not seem to be replicated within our society. No media articles, no newspapers making demands for an explanation as to how this could happen, nor are the general public marching together to demand that current IPP prisoners be released. 

Prisoner suicides seem to feature daily in my twitter feeds and facebook notifications, in my e-mail inbox and during my chats with friends. So why is there not a national outcry? Prisoners are equal human beings to all of us, who may just have made a bad choice, who may be a victim of abuse or addiction, or who may, in fact, be innocent of their conviction. Nobody deserves to die, alone in a locked cell, so desperate to escape that a blade has been fashioned from razors or glass, or meds have been begged, stolen and borrowed to be stored up for that moment when roll-check is done and the wing is quiet.

Alan Travis wrote in the Guardian in April this year about this very topic. In the previous 12 months there had been 100 suicides in English and Welsh prisons, the highest number in 25 years. In the 12 months before there had been 79. This earlier figure is high in itself, but an increase of 25% in just one year is unacceptable. https://goo.gl/Ti1hpt 

Three ladies I met in prison are now dead through committing suicide. Three individual human beings, with families, friends, and skills and talents, who should have had a future after their punishment was served. Charlie was an incredible artist. Her mental health problems were largely ignored in prison, and her troubled soul and her mental angst gave rise to the most amazing artwork, much of which was exhibited by the Koestler Trust.

Having experienced prison life I have an insight into the utter desolation that visits you inside. Prisoners like Charlie feel they are fighting a losing battle, they see no light at the end of the tunnel. The corruption inside prison, the abuse of power by staff (especially healthcare staff), the lack of mental health support or treatment, the loneliness and boredom and despair. Prison is hard. Let nobody tell you otherwise. 

But is it right that this should lead to suicide? Something has to change. The entire prison system has failed. The way prisoners are treated reflects badly on us as a society. We, our society, are responsible for these deaths, each and every one of them. We who voted for our governments, we who are complacent about those who aren't in the forefront of our minds. We who fail to consider how we can improve the lives of ALL our society, not just those we consider to be worthy.

Charlie, you were a special person. You touched so many lives and I pray you have finally found peace. Charlie Noakes RIP 2016.